Hanging In There

I am not looking forward to this afternoon
and yet I want it to get here and get it over with.

This afternoon we have a consult with a surgeon for my daughter.
She is 14 and her gallbladder doesn't want to do its job.

She has just been through so much.

Her medical chart is a million miles long.

Nothing like cancer or heart problems.
But still serious.

Ever since she was little she has had some kind of health problems.

First, she was on non-stop decongestants just so she could even breathe.
Had her adenoids removed and tubes put in her ears.
Also her sinuses irrigated.

Than later her tonsils became enlarged from a virus and would not go down so another surgery to take them out.

Finally after numerous sinus infections she was tested for allergies.

She was put on an inhaler type medication and she fought to the death not to use it.
So they gave her nasal spray instead.
She also had to take pills.

And insurance kept making us try this or that first when it had already been tried and we knew it didn't work.

Than she had her non-stop seizures and had every test known to man done.
CT scan
spinal tap
EEG
MRI and tons of blood tests.
I don't even remember everything.

She's had concussions and pneumonia.
The pneumonia was bad.
Went to the ER and was told she was fine
of course she wasn't fine.
We ended up back there and they admitted her that time.

Now, she needs immediate medical care, she goes straight to Des Moines.

But due to the seizures her teeth got knocked out when they put a tube down her throat.
Teeth grew in and they were all crooked.

Enter the world of orthodontics.
First she had the quad helix, which is basically a retainer that doesn't come out.
Next she had partial braces
Than a retainer.
A short break and now full braces for another year and a half.
After that 2 more years of retainers.

And can't forget the dermatologist.
Tried that but it really wasn't doing any good.
And the minute chemical peel was brought up, that was all she wrote.

As a parent, you do what you think is best for your child.

My husband and I have done that.

But, there just comes a point when I wonder when is it all gonna end.

She is 14 and she does not deserve all of this.

I know, I know.
Life isn't fair.

No, it certainly is not anywhere near fair.

My daughter has had more medical procedures done to her than I have.
Hell, more than my mom has.

Just doesn't seem right.

I know, somethings just don't make sense and never will.
I don't think we are supposed to make sense of everything.
It is the great mystery of life.

Some people will just say
"It's God's will"
and all that crap.

I really don't understand how that is supposed to make anyone feel any better.
Fine if you want to believe all that.

But, when something bad is going on that is the last thing I want to hear.
At that point I just want to tell those people to blow it out their ass.