Tuesday, June 27, 2017

Sometimes I Don't Want to be Grateful

We love in the grateful age.

Be grateful for truckers and farmers.
Be grateful it wasn't worse.
Be grateful for what you have.

There's the gratitude journal.
Come up with five things a day that you are grateful for.
It doesn't matter how small.
It is supposed to make you realize what you do have.

Sometimes I don't feel grateful.
Sometimes I feel sad or pissed about how everything is going,

Yes, I have a house.
It has bad wiring, a crumbling foundation, a roof that is in horribly sad shape among many other things and I can't afford to fix any of it.
Am I always grateful that I have a place to live?
Yes. And no.

My husband has an incurable disease and he will die from it and the treatment they have him on does not seem to be working.
I could be grateful that he didn't die this morning.
But, I am not.
I don't know how to turn this situation into something to be grateful for.

I think it is fine to not be grateful all the time.
Life sucks. Sometimes it sucks a whole lot.

It's like in "The Facts of Life" theme song.
You take the good, you take the bad, you take 'em both and what do ya have? The facts of life.

It is good to be positive.
But, when things are shit, they are shit.

When your health is bad, it is okay to hate it.
I have heard from many people that they should be grateful that it isn't worse.
Why?

Feelings are feelings.
They aren't good or bad.
They just are what they are.