Thursday, February 12, 2015

IBS Stands For

You're probably thinking it stands for Irritable Bowel Syndrome.
You'd be wrong.
It stands for It's Bull Shit.

It means they have no clue where the pain is coming from so they are just going to call it something.
I told the doctor that the pains started after the last time I tried gluten and they were going away.
But, oh no.
I don't have a degree so I don't know what I am talking about.

It must be Crohn's.
You need a colonoscopy.

They did find diverticulosis, which are weak spots in the intestines, but they didn't find that a big deal at all.

They told me they would never heal.
Strangely enough, I have seen people state that theirs did heal.

The medical community swears that there is no connection between diverticulosis and celiac.
Yet, a lot of celiacs seem to get it.

Right before he left the room, the GI said it's IBD.
Which, actually, from the paperwork it is IBS.

They are two different things.
But, I am sure he knew that.
Maybe he figured I wouldn't.

Honeyman thinks he knows what he is doing.
I really have my doubts.

His whole idea is to put me on metamucil for a couple weeks and call his office and let them know how I am doing.
Gee, more fiber in my diet.
I wonder why I didn't think of that.
Oh, wait.
I did.
About 5 years ago.

So, I am thinking that I am going to go back to what I was doing before that was starting to make me feel better.

I am suppose to go back for another visit in a couple months.
Not sure if I will cancel or not.
At this point, the way I feel is that I have spent enough money on this.

Monday, February 2, 2015

I Love You ~ Spacially Speaking

What is this "I love you to the moon and back" business?
Where did it come from?

I can't fathom the reasoning behind such a phrase.
Aren't we suppose to love unconditionally, i.e. without boundaries?

To the moon and back is pretty much boundarified.
The average distance to the moon is 238,857 miles.
So, back to earth is that much.

But, depending on time of day, it could be less or more.

That means I could love you more on Friday at 11:30 am than I do on Sunday at 4:30 pm.
Maybe less, depending where in the world we are.

I actually like to just say "I love you" and leave it that.
Simple and and uncomplicated.

Sometimes I use the phrase "Always and forever".
The one spoken to knows what that means.

But, for those that think an "I love you" is just not good enough, I would like to propose a change.

I love you... infinity and beyond!