But, I Need New Clothes!

I was lucky enough to come into a little bit of money recently and come to the conclusion that I was long overdue for new clothes.

Seriously.
My clothes are worn out.
They are fit to become the wardrobe of a scarecrow.

Well, if a scarecrow wore a "Pinky and the Brain" sweatshirt.
I have had that thing for over 20 years and I am having a hard time parting with it.

My jeans are all ratty and I have no nice clothes to speak of.

So, I went shopping.

OK I went to one store.
But, it was a clothing store.
Mostly.

I plan to do more extensive shopping another day.
Because, I couldn't find anything that fit me.

I have come to some realizations.

Fitting room mirrors are terribly MEAN.
I took my pants off to try on jeans and I was horrified by what I saw.
Is that really me? The chick with the cottage cheese attached to her thighs.
It couldn't.
It just couldn't.

So, that was depressing.
I still don't get it.
I looked in my mirror at home and I don't look QUITE that bad.

Next up was the fact that most of the jean styles available are awful.
They either had a skinny leg or they had a horrible cheap looking wash and stitch.
And don't get me started on the fact that many of the pairs had worn or ripped spots.

If I wanted rips or worn spots, I'd just keep wearing the ones I already have.

I finally locate a pair of nice pants and jeans that don't look too bad.
They seem a little long.
But, I am hoping when I put them on they won't be so bad.

Wrong.

They fit good except way too long.
I would need stilts to wear them.

My niece tells me, as a society we are getting taller.
Where are these taller people?
I sure as hell have not encountered any large groups of tall woman with long legs wandering about.

The sweats were a different story though.
Those were too short.

Sigh.

I did find one thing.
It's a hoodie.

Not a total loss.
But close.